Dating a younger man advice carbon dating change
My energy wasn't spent worrying about whether it was going to go anywhere and when/if it was going to end. As much as I hate to admit it, when I've gone into dating someone in the past who I thought had the potential to be something serious, I've started putting pressure on it. We become so caught up in the of what that relationship could be rather than getting the chance to see if that person or that relationship is something we even want. If you're not worried about it ending or where it's going, then you're not worried about doing anything that might mess things up, so you're just completely yourself, like I was with him.
When there's no pressure on it, you can simply spend your time enjoying each other, getting to know each other and allowing it to unfold naturally. I didn't follow any "rules;" I said exactly what I felt like saying (in fact, I was incredibly honest and straightforward), and did exactly what I felt like doing.
through it, I had some very profound realizations about myself, love and dating. I decided to get into a relationship with him anyway.
And, not only was I super happy, it also proved to be one of the most drama-free, stress-free dating experiences I've had in years.
It just means managing the age-old paradox of staying true to what you want big-picture for your life while still being present in each moment and not attached to the outcome. I have spent way too much time making excuse after excuse for men I've dated, thinking that if I were just better or more awesome, or if I waited long enough, he would become "ready" for the same things that I am ready for... But finally, through dating this younger guy, it sunk in -- it's actually not about me!
Because the truth is, you can't build an authentic relationship if you're not authentically yourself.
I have learned from these things that the only way -- I now believe -- to build a genuine relationship is to be in the moment and to be fully ourselves, without the constant fear about where it's going to go or if it's going to end.
Not only is that the way for it to grow, but also the only way you can truly get to experience the joy of real connection with another person. When two people are just in different places in their lives with regards to relationships, then it's just the way it is, and there is nothing you can do about it.
This also relates to someone's issues or emotional blockages.